All Vick, All the Time

BY ADAM WILSON
Thanks to Digressions in Abundance

Last night I was watching Michael Vick coverage because I am very interested in what 7,000 different & random people think about it. So it was nice to hear some newspaper writer from Atlanta, who by her own admission doesn't like football and doesn't follow the Falcons or Vick, tell me her deepest feelings about the whole situation. It was good to hear her opinion of the impact Vick's (who, I repeat, she doesn't pay attention to) legal troubles are having on her city.

It was nice to hear Chris Mortensen report 55 times about what is happening with the case RIGHT NOW. It was nice to see Suze Kolber. (no seriously, I like her. Like Joe Namath said.) It was nice to see the game crew interview the "ESPN legal analyst" for 3 segments...asking him the same questions over and over again. By the way...do you think Roger Cossack was mad he didn't get the face time? I bet he was. Isn't he supposed to be ESPN's resident legal expert? I can only assume his head exploded after being on every single ESPN show for the previous 10 hours. Otherwise, they would have flown him in, right?

It was nice to see video of Vick apologizing to everyone in the world for what he did. It was especially nice to see it multiple times. Although it seemed to me that he was more sorry that he got caught. He wasn't so apologetic when he lied to the NFL, the Falcons, and the Police and plead not guilty. But NOW he is sorry. Of course he is. He is trying to avoid jail time. Now is the exactly perfect time to "be sorry".

It was nice to hear that now it is just time to move and and the rehabilitation of Michael Vick can begin. Ummm...why? Hasn't the bad stuff just started for him? He still has to go through sentencing. oh yeah...AND PRISON. HE HAS TO GO TO PRISON FOR AT LEAST 1 YEAR!!!! How can it be time for everyone to move on...it literally JUST HAPPENED. LESS THAN 24 HOURS AGO!!!!

But here's the thing that bothered me about last night. I'm sitting there trying to enjoy some Michael Vick analysis, minding my own business. And every once in a while they would start talking about the football game that was being played on the field in front of them! Ridiculous! I didn't turn on Monday Night Football to watch and hear about football!! I turned on Monday Night Football to watch and hear about Michael Vick.

All I have to say is that if I turn on football again this week and they are talking about the game instead of Michael Vick...I might kick my dog.

(just kidding...I'm not going to kick my dog. Put down the phone...leave PETA out of this)